Congruence , on the other hand, is a fairly accurate match between the self-concept and reality. According to Rogers, parents promote incongruence if they give their children conditional love.
If a parent accepts a child only when the child behaves a particular way, the child is likely to block out experiences that are considered unacceptable. On the other hand, if the parent shows unconditional love, the child can develop congruence. Adults whose parents provided conditional love would continue in adulthood to distort their experiences in order to feel accepted.
Rogers thought that people experience anxiety when their self-concepts are threatened. To protect themselves from anxiety, people distort their experiences so that they can hold on to their self-concept.
People who have a high degree of incongruence are likely to feel very anxious because reality continually threatens their self-concepts. Some ideas are: Keep an inspirational journal Write whatever inspires you. Know your values It is a great exercise to discover and uncover your values. Walk the talk Once you have a sense of un understanding of yourself and your values, you can set an intention every day to live day by day congruent to your thoughts and action.
Self- reflection Questions: What does it mean for you to 'live congruently? Coaching Application The general definition of congruence is in agreement or harmony. Knowing your values, yet not acting and living according to them, is a form of incongruence.
The essential for the client is to understand what is getting in the way of their incongruence. Some questions from the coach to be curious of: What are the values or belief of the client?
What is making it a problem for the client? What is holding the client back from being the person they want to be? For the client to be congruent, three attributes to create a growth-promoting climate to help the client to move forward and become capable of becoming their true self are: non-judgemental acceptance and care empathy The coach has to create a safe environment for the client to let them fully express themselves.
What attributes about this person the client respect? What is the client's view of their value? Some questions to help the client to move forward: What is in the way of acting the same as their value? What will be useful for the client to have their thoughts and actions align? What is the impact on them when their thoughts and actions are aligned? Reflection: How can the coach support the client to live congruently?
How can the coach support client to navigate from incongruency? What are some types of exercises that could support them in discovering their values? Terms Terms and condition Privacy Policy. This website uses cookies to improve your experience. We'll assume you're ok with this, but you can opt-out if you wish.
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We also use third-party cookies that help us analyze and understand how you use this website. These cookies will be stored in your browser only with your consent. You also have the option to opt-out of these cookies. But opting out of some of these cookies may have an effect on your browsing experience. Congruence: Congruence is the most important attribute, according to Rogers.
The therapist does not havea facade, that is, the therapist's internal and external experiences are one inthe same. In short, the therapist is authentic. This authenticity functions as amodel of a human being struggling toward greater realness.
However, Rogers'concept of congruence does not imply that only a fully self-actualized therapist can be effective incounseling Corey, Since therapists are also human, they cannot beexpected to be fully authentic. Instead, the person-centered model assumes that,if therapists are congruent in the relationship with the client, then theprocess of therapy will get under way
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